12
July

Trust vs. Fear

My sweet friend reflected to me today that I am doing a trust walk in my life right now. I thought to myself, “yeah, feels more like a trust run!” I am wanting to run to the finish line to keep from feeling the discomfort of the fear and unknown. I bounce between trust and fear it seems, by the hour. I experience total acceptance and confidence in myself and in what lies ahead and then fear sets in and I have these mini panic attacks..where trust, faith, and belief allude me. Of course, I could also bucket it within my mind and say “reason sets in.” And maybe that is partially true but I’ve never gone about things the way most do. I take risks. Sometimes big ones and they don’t always pan out. But I learn and I have no regrets. (Ok, there is one and I will write about that soon.)

Anyways, the motivation for this post is just to call it out for what it is: trust, fear, reason, risk, success, failure or all of the above. My intention is to remember to be in it. To respect the process and to stay awake to the beauty of it all. I’m alive. I’m blessed. I’m in choice and I’m aware of all of that. When I sink back into the fear, my intention is to feel that too. There is no need to reject it. It only holds me more deeply when I do.

Do you know what I mean?

Are you letting fear hold you back in someway because when it’s present you reject it, ignore it or better yet distract yourself from feeling it by engaging in some other behavior that isn’t necessarily serving you? (Unconscious eating, internet mind numbing or TV engrossment?)

I get it. Doing it or done, all the above.

And I’m just putting it out there.

For your consideration…

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1
July

July 1

There is something about this July 1 and it being on a Monday that really feels like a fresh start. I love fresh starts. It might be an illusion AND it works. Don’t you feel on Mondays it’s like a new beginning? I suppose if your not thrilled with your job, it won’t emote exactly what I’m speaking to and yet it is a fresh start.

Being that it is July 1, which is exactly one half of the year, there is a fresh start to the second half of the year. Anything special you’d like to experience this year? Now is a great time to declare it…whatever it is. You’ve got 6 whole months to make it happen. They say September is the “new” new year. Maybe July 1 is really the “new” new year. Independence day is just a few moments away. Why not? We’ve got red, white and blue party streamers waiting to celebrate.

It may have been a Pollyanna moment. Nonetheless I felt called to share it in case any of you are feeling kinda crappy about something you still haven’t done that you’ve been meaning to do. I know how that goes. The good news? It’s the new new years and now is your chance to make it happen.

All of this to translate: stop talking about it and do it or just stop talking about it. Maybe you aren’t supposed to do it.

Be good to you!

(A good friend says this to me almost every time we’re about to part ways. It’s a really nice reminder of how I can choose to be with myself!)

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26
June

Let’s Be in the Love

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There is a lot of loving going on right now with the amazing news today! And a whole lot of singing too, Im sure.

I felt inspired to fly on the tails of this beautiful news to encourage all of us to be asking the question, “What Makes Your Heart Sing?” In the spirit of equality, freedom, and the open-heartedness that is in the air, it’s okay to be doing things, moving towards, being with whatever makes your Heart sing. Life is just too short to handle it any other way.

Love!

ps. I just wrote this blog post from my iPhone! Yes!

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1
May

2 – REbound

First let me start by saying, Thank You!  Thank You for reading along with me.  Whether you have read all of the last 30 posts or a few here and there, thank you!   I set out to complete a 32 day process of writing in this blog to kickstart my writing process.  You know, to WD-40 the writing joint?!?  That being said, I don’t see myself posting daily and clogging up everyone’s inbox with my daily notes.  And I also don’t foresee myself writing so much about myself.  The commitment of writing daily pushed me to look inside and find something new to share each day.  With a little more time in between writing, I can explore more, take a few pics with my fancy cameras (and then glamourize them with all my apps) and focus in on some areas that I love.  Like books, people, places, and a little fashion, too!  Okay, maybe a lot of fashion!  Point being more to come only less frequently.

So, what is REbound you ask?

Me!  Today I experienced myself completing a full rebound!  As I shared in my last post about procrastination, I was up late last night completing and had an 8am appt this morning.  Not enough sleep for this girl.  I was grouchy, frustrated, short tempered, and then judging myself for all of the above.  I had a few interactions with some people that triggered the heck out of me and I was ripe for a brawl!  I got the dark side, YEP!, and it was rearing to go today.  At about 10.15a, after a lovely co-worker tried to say good morning and I scowled, I decided it was time for an intervention with myself.  You see, I work in a tight environment.  There is no hiding.  And when that dark side is mirrored back to me it just makes it more amplified and yucky.  So I got up and went for a short walk, vented to a friend, let the energy go, and I chose to re-engage my day.  It wasn’t easy at first.  I was in that energy of a stubborn, petulant child.  I was frustrated and I wanted to be. Not really, but you know what I mean when you get stuck in something and instead of releasing the pressure, it just builds in our attempt to justify it.  Well, guess what?  I let it go.  I just chose to remember who I am and that none of it really matters anyways and that being in that energetic would just suck ASS!  So I gave it up.

Tonight when I was cooking myself some delicious foods and feeling so good for taking care of myself, I had the awareness that I had totally rebounded my day.  It wasn’t a crappy day at all.  It was a great day!  Yes!

WE all have superpowers.  We just have to be willing to use them.

For your consideration…

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1
May

3 – Procrastination

Anyone out there have the cure for procrastination?  I would so like a quick fix on that one. I know we all have a little procrastination in us and if I were to evaluate my level of procrastination I would say it is the theme of keeping me a “last minute Lucy.”  You know what I mean?

I am interested in so many things and therefore am often juggling many things at once. This is designed by choice and brings me a lot of joy and inspiration.  In essence, by nature, I am signed up for more than I can accomplish in the 24 hours of the day.  (If I could rock 4 hours of sleep, I might be on to something!) That being said, if in all that I am engaged in, I have clarified something I will for sure do that day, I find myself doing it late, late into the night.  Like this here blog post.  Ugh!

I know it’s not complicated to unravel procrastination.  I’d just like to not do it anymore.  I’d like it to be that simple.  I won’t procrastinate anymore.  Hmm.  I don’t think that will work.  Plus I have learned from some smartee pants people that putting anything in the negative is a sure fire way of not making it happen.  Let’s try this again.

My intention is to set realistic goals for myself, honoring who I am, my inquisitive and always learning nature, while finding abundant daily completions.  I will place my energy first, on those high dividend items.

AKA: Do less. Do the most important stuff first. Do less. :-)

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29
April

5 – Listening

Are you listening inside to the voice that speaks within you?  Do you hear it calling you forward or trying to share with you something it wants you to know?  Sometimes when we aren’t listening the information will come through in physical ways.  Our body will have parts with discomfort or tightness or anxiety or just more energy.  Information will come to us to support us, to offer an opportunity to pause and listen.  If we haven’t quite exercised this muscle, this information can come in less subtle ways.  It may be a car comes out of no where and we are alerted quickly calling us forward to pay attention or someone walking in front of us is too slow – might not mean they are slow, it may mean we need to slow down.

This past year I have been focused on connecting more deeply to my inner knowing, my intuition.  I knew when I ventured into this intention it would be a lot about quieting down, shushing the noise around my head and sometimes my heart to really hear what was at my core.  It has been extraordinary to experience quieting and listening then hearing and feeling and then knowing.  We all have an inner guide, compass, barometer, that is steering us, directing us, and informing us of when, where, and with whom we will join.  I sometimes joke that I fall asleep in my head – that I forget I have this skill, this muscle and that I know how to use it.  I may be experiencing something that is uncomfortable and look only at the symptom rather than the cause.  I can get busy being distracted focusing on the way I “feel” rather than pausing, placing a little space between what I am “feeling” and where it may be coming from.  When I get clear that my intention is to listen and to hear, the clarity comes forward immediately, just as quickly as these words stream from my consciousness to this page.

For example, earlier I was feeling some tightness in my upper back between my shoulder blades.  I don’t feel this symptom often and it was uncomfortable.  I decided to ask my body what was this physical feeling attempting to tell me and immediately, “open, open your heart” came forward.  I have been quite inward the last five days.  I needed to do this to take care of myself and this physical symptom brought forward the inquiry and now the realization.  When this message came forward I identified with it straight away.

The tightness which also means constriction or contraction felt like a metaphor for the closed off way of being I have been in.  I realized in that moment it was time to let that go and to open my heart – to share my heart more openly and actively.  It was time to come out from under my solitude.  In that listening, I derived this information.  It resonated within me – the inner knowing, I spoke of earlier.  I could hear the message because I trust my intuition.  All of this because I have chosen to quiet within, to pause, and to listen.  To be my own healer.

We have this capacity if we trust and explore.  It’s that or I could have griped about the feeling, perhaps let it be the reason I become snippy, and even take a muscle relaxer to quell the symptom.  You decide.  My path worked for me.  The tightness has dissipated, my heart is opening, I am looking forward to sharing it more tomorrow with whomever I am in contact with, and I have deepened in the knowing that I can listen within, empower myself, and take care.

For your consideration…

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26
April

7 – Asking

I recently committed to a fundraising goal of $1000 for something I wholeheartedly believe in.  Last year, I committed to $500 and because I had more monies than I do now, I just paid it myself.  I wasn’t really sure how I was going to raise the $1000 this year and there was a knowing inside myself that I was ready to go for it.

I have to say that I realize the only difference between this year and last was my learning how to ask.  In the past, I could have fallen into the category of a person that “does a lot for others” and didn’t always feel that being reciprocated.  I see now that I was challenged at asking for what I wanted.  Sometimes the things I want or need are things that come from within and then there are those other areas where it is okay to ask for support.  I am learning that skill and with this fundraising effort it was so much fun to ask and watch it easily come to fruition!  It was awesome to see people I have not spoken with since high school donating to my goal. I realized that we all want to be called forward to support and it cannot hurt to ask.  Many times, by asking we are providing an opportunity for another to stand up and participate. This point is demonstrated in some beautiful fundraising that is occurring supporting individuals affected by the recent events in Boston.  Check this out!  And here are few more.

I am so grateful for the generosity that was demonstrated to me in raising this $1000.  I am absolutely more inclined to fundraise again and more importantly, I am excited to respond to others that ask me!

 

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22
April

11 – Love I

gratitude picThis image and words of Rumi remind me of the Love that I am consciously deepening in with myself.  I have come to understand and believe that all that I feel, in every moment, is in direct relationship to the Love that I am experiencing with myself.  If I am embracing who I am, being gentle and kind with myself, accepting my choices and letting it all be okay, I experience grace and ease.  I feel lighter, see brighter and feel at peace.  If on the other hand, I fall asleep in my head :-) and forget that I can do this and choose this and I awaken feeling tired and grumpy and I judge that because I wanted to feel a different way when I woke up, then chances are the person driving in front of me isn’t doing it right.  I am keenly aware of how it’s tough to find parking on my street and that train of thinking ensues.

It’s that simple.

I am not saying it is always simple to make the choice.  I am saying it is simply about how much Love will I share with myself that day.  Love makes all the difference.  When I choose into the Love, I am essentially emancipated from the self-doubt, from fear, and the notion that I am in control and need to hold tight to that.  When that awareness of surrender is in me, I am empowered, enormously creative, joyful and my energy is magnetic – meaning it is reflected back to me in all those I encounter and that is amazing.  That is Love.

What’s is gonna be for you today?

For your consideration…

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17
April

16 – Tapping

Have you heard of tapping?  It is a new (newer) phenomena where by tapping on to certain parts of ourselves, our meridians, while saying statements out loud, yes, out loud,  it’s possible to release or relieve whatever “ailment” we might be experiencing.  I am serious.  I actually tried the one in the first link below and felt relief in my lower back.  Call me “woo woo” if you like. :-)

Here’s the thing, I am open.  I like to learn.  When I hear about something that seems slightly plausible especially as it relates to ways of empowering myself to heal and care for myself, I am in.  I prefer never to be in victim consciousness and I have an insatiable desire to learn.  This motivates my engagement and willingness to try things many others might not.  (However I do believe the planet is shifting and a lot of things many were not open to are becoming so.  No doubt, the internet, has A LOT to do with that.)

All that being said, here is some info on tapping:

An interview with cool and quirkly Maria Forleo:
(you can skip towards the end if you just want to demo a “tapping script”)

The Tapping Solution website and info trailer:

Here

A Huff Post article from Nick Ortner:

Here

There are many other resources out there regarding tapping and these ones inform nicely and clearly.

For your consideration…

 

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14
April

20 – Be Amazing!

Why don’t we all just be Amazing?  Who or what is standing in our way?  Or better yet, rather than pondering that question, just go be Amazing, anyways.  It really can be that simple if we let it.  No need to show up half way, second rate, wishing to be somewhere else.  Just choose in to wherever you are.  Right now.  Do it.  Be Amazing.  Please.

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P.S. Thx EC!

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